I. — NOBBYNATION

First published in Ideas, Hulton& Co., London, Dec 29, 1909

For the next few weeks the General Election will absorb the attention of our hundreds of thousands of readers. In these circumstances, Mr. Clarence Clark's experience in connection with elections, and his views on a grave political crisis, may be, if not helpful, at least entertaining.—Editor, Ideas.

"ME father," sald Nobby Clark, thoughtfully,"in a manner of speakin' was one of the practicalest chaps you could imagine. He was one of them keen, grey-eyed men with business ability that you read about nowadays when the Tariff Reform candidate is bein' described by his favourite reporter. He had the country at heart; he used to carry a bit of it about in his pocket to chuck at any stray policeman he happened to see.

"When he saw our trade dwindlin', an' foreign-made goods comin' in to compete with British-made goods, he used to cry like a child.

"'Tariff Reform,' he used to say, 'means work for all—who want it. It means More Hands Wanted. I can see the day a-comin',' he sez, enthusiastic, 'when I shall be wearin' me boots out gettin' out of the way of work. An' what will that mean? More work for the shoemaker, more work for the pavement maker, more work for the manufacturer of police whistles. O England!' he sez, with tears in his eyes, 'oh, me country—as far as I know.'

"That's how elections always took father. I remember the last election. He was very bitter.

"'What!' he sez, tremblin' with emotion, 'what!' he sez, 'can I sleep in me bed at night with the thought of them poor Javanese fellers a-slavin' in the mines of Johannysburg? Is this what I might have died for, if I'd been a soldier—only I had more sense—is this what I squandered me b