CHAPTER1
FINDINGARNOLDS

“Coincidence is God’s way of remaininganonymous”

- AlbertEinstein

I have no memories at all of my father, Arnolds Pommers. Growing up, he sort of didn’t exist for me, since I was 1 year and 11 months old when he passed on November 7, 1948. This empty hole was actually reinforced by having, starting at age 7, a father-figure, my stepfather Aleks Siraks. My mother Anna spoke little to me of her past life with Arnolds. Some of this was to avoid memories and reminders of difficult times, and some was to keep herself and me forward-looking and appreciative of Aleks. After all, he was taking on financial and other fatherly responsibilities for a child not his own, with the natural lessening of the biological imperative. But as I matured, married Sue, and had a family of my own, the role of my biological father became more important and my need to understand Arnolds a bit more began, and then grew.

1.1 FIRSTCHAT

That first moment of insight remains very vivid. It was January in the mid-1980s when I flew to San Diego, California to attend a Simulation Society conference. My distributor in the area had arranged for a room in Rancho Santa Fe, a beautiful inland suburb. I was sitting on the small patio, eating a sandwich, when I felt Arnolds’ presence. He was hovering just overhead, although I couldn’t see him…and said that I should visit him, although I heard no voice. It was disquieting, yet not scary at all, but a sensation I had never had before, and would have not believed in, had I not felt it. After those few seconds had passed, I resolved to find Arnolds.

Several photos exist of Dad’s funeral. A key one was of his gravestone, a large vertical monument, 3 or 4 feet high, engraved with the name, birth and death dates and places. The Latvian inscription “Milestiba Nekad Nebeidzas” (“Love Never Ends”) was carved into the large stone burial slab set in the ground directly in front of this headstone. Other slabs and their associated headstones were next to his. After returning from the San Diego trip, I asked my mother Anna where the cemetery was located. She said it was in Soltau, Germany, near the main road from Soltau to Hamburg, on a small side road, in the Wolterd