Introduction – Good Things Happen To Those Who Wait
It was a task I'd done a million times—something as simple as changing my 15-month-old daughter, Jaimie's, diaper. But her reaction to such a mundane chore sent a chill through my bones.
“No!” Jaimie screamed as I laid her back on the change table.
“Be still, sweetie. This'll only take a minute.”
Instead of calming her, my voice seemed to upset her more. She covered her ears with her hands, screwed her eyes shut, and banged her head against the table. “No, no, noooooooooooooo!” she screeched, the dull thud of her head against the wood emphasizing every ‘no’.
Only when her feet touched the ground again did her hands come off her ears and her screaming cease. I watched her run from the room, leaving me with ringing in my ears and heaviness in my heart. Fighting back tears of frustration, I knew something was very wrong. This just wasn't normal.
From an outsider's perspective, this would seem somewhat normal behavior for a toddler. However, Jaimie's behavior wasn't stemming from not getting her way. As we found out later on, she was unable to cope in the world around her and wasn't able to communicate this to me in any other way. Adding to her frustration was her total dislike of being held, comforted, or otherwise touched. Jaimie was basically trapped in a struggle between wanting to be comforted and touched but her body being utterly repulsed by the feeling of touch. Everyone thought I was nuts, but justknew something was wrong with Jaimie as early as three months into her life.
While other wee ones seemed comforted with touching, hugs, and kisses, Jaimie was the opposite. Whenever we picked her up, she struggled and screamed but calmed down, somewhat, as soon as we put her back down. As she grew, the small odd things I'd noticed about her temperament grew with her: she adjusted slowly to change, startled easily, rarely smiled or laughed, and was so afraid of other people that I spent entire visits or shopping trips with Jaimie clinging desperately to me. A simple, “Hi there!” from a stranger, or even her own Daddy, triggered tears immediately.
On top of this, Jaimie had terrible fits where she hurt herself in some way—such as head banging, biting herself or other people/objects, scratching herself, or pulling out her hair—on purpose.
Whenever I addressed my concerns with family or friends, I was made to feel I was reading too much into things because I was a first time mom. Even Jaimie's pediatrician said her behavior was simply chalked up to “spiritedness” and we just needed to have patience with her.
“She'll grow out of this stage soon enough,” he said at the end of each visit.
When Jaimie's behavior worsened to the point where she had fits for hours at a time every day, I knew she needed help far beyond what I could handle on my own. When she was about two and a half, Jaimie's pediatrician finally listened to my pleas and directed us to an Early Intervention Program. After only one visit, the occupational therapist (OT), named Donna, who specialized in children with sensory issues, was able to deduce Jaimie's behavior down to three words: Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) [At the time, she'd called it Sensory Integration Dysfunction, or SID.]
While reading our story, it's important for people to remember that Jaimie's form of SPD is quite severe, with all her sensory systems being affected at some level. It's also important to remember that Jaimie's for