: Nancy Wesson
: Moving Your Aging Parents Fulfilling their Needs and Yours Before, During, and After the Move
: Loving Healing Press
: 9781615999392
: 1
: CHF 6.00
:
: Pflege
: English
: 288
: DRM
: PC/MAC/eReader/Tablet
: ePUB

Will you be ready when it's time...?
Whether whittling down to the essentials for a parent moving into a room or two or downsizing for ourselves, ignoring the spirit and basing decisions on health and safety alone could have devastating results.
In this hope filled book you will learn how to:
Identify needs and desires to create a quality new life Cope with the Depression Era mind-set Create emotionally sustaining environments to nurture the soul Ready and sell the family home Ask the RIGHT questions to help divest of treasures Manage your energy and spirit throughout the process Determine when it's time to consider alternative placement Perform the ordinary in a non-ordinary way -- allowing you to preserve and heal family relationships
Expert's Acclaim for Moving Your Aging Parents
'A creative and inspiring godsend for helping Mom and Dad transition to the next phase of life. Valuable for caregivers, healthcare professionals, and seniors interested in aging with independence, dignity and grace.'
--Jacqueline Marcell, author Elder Rage, host of Coping With Caregiving radio show
'What a truly remarkable and elegantly written book. The information is relevant for every relocation regardless of the age or circumstances of the client.'
--Sally B. Yaryan, Director, Professional Development& Education; Austin Board of REALTORS (r)
'As a thirty-five year plus veteran of health care practice as a Registered Nurse, specializing in the care of the elderly, I offer my heart-felt endorsement of this excellent book. It offers concrete plans to follow and emphasizes the emotional and spiritual counterparts that transform seemingly difficult chores into acts of mutual joy, growth, and love.'
--Mary Durfor for Rebecca Reads

My Mother's Chair


Rain is slamming against the windshield and I can't see the edge of I-10 that runs through the swamp west of Lake Charles. I'm only an hour out so it seems a waste to find a hotel. I can't even call mom to let her know I'll be late because I can't risk the distraction. It's all I can do to keep my little Subaru WRX on the road; even the all-wheel drive is being challenged by the wall of water shoving me sideways—delivered by an eighteen-wheeler that just barreled by. There is a sense of urgency about this trip as mom has finally made the decision to consider a move nearer to me. My sister and I have decided to alternate trips to her home to start the inevitable process of clearing things out in an effort to be ready to move to a smaller place. This is the first foray into that unknown territory.

Her agreement to move to a retirement complex near me (sometime in the next six months or so are her terms) has been nothing if not miraculous, but as luck would have it, her unit has become available early—four months early actually. The decision to take the unit had to be made now or wait another year, so we are beginning the process and my trip over to her represents the first step into the reality that she can a no longer manage on her own. How has it come to this so quickly? It seems that only last year she was talking about another rigorous trip to Costa Rica.

I am struggling to stay on the road while I wonder what stormy weather lies ahead in terms of this new stage. Further, I don't have time for this week away from a consulting business that depends on my personal presence to keep me funded. I've just relocated back to Austin after the realization that the move to West Virginia, while it was right at the time, is not right five years later. I've moved back to my “tribe” and I am just getting my business ramped up.

Realities of Aging


A year earlier, I had made this trip to help mom recover fromanother break-in, the first one having occurred nine years ago in the Baton Rouge home, where I grew up. It was the event that prompted the move to asafer neighborhood, closer to family, in Lake Charles.

On one level, I am superbly suited to help her. Helping people organize, move, create comfortable spaces for themselves and make life changes is my professional life. I love doing it and I'm good at it. But doing it for Mom was loaded with all manner of emotional baggage. I remembered some of it from the previous move, but that was just to a new city near friends (and excellent birding) and a more manageable house. She was in her mid seventies then, the landscape was different and she was more resilient. This time, she was unhinged and feeling victimized on many levels. The balance between intimacy and detachment possible with clients totally disintegrated in the presence of her despair. If I allowed myself to get enmeshed in the grief, it derailed the progress we needed to make. If I detached, it ignored her need for connection and my ability to listen with my heart. The same compassion, patience, tact and humor spontaneously present with others, became intermingled with anger, fear, frustration, old roles, expectatio